My Back to Basics is sooooo over.

So my Back-to-Basics for the month of September has come to an end.

I've been thinking about this one for a couple of days, maybe a couple of days longer, in fact, since my Back-to-Basics actually came to an end on Friday September 28, when I showed up at Jonathan's place to take part in filming episode 3 of Big Primal http://big-primal.com/ where we prepared 200 wings and enough sweet potato fries to feed an army.  There was red wine.  And there were chicken wings dipped in melted chocolate (and bacon, of course there was bacon--Jonathan does nothing without bacon).  So hell, it was just too much fun to say no to.

So, what's the result of my...25 days of eating clean and easy?  Did I have any sudden health revelations?  Did I lose a load of weight?

.....No.

Seriously.

Nothing really changed at all.

Isn't that a complete disappointment?  I know, I know--lunch bag letdown.

So, where'd I go wrong?  Well, I ate out once every week--of that, twice I had beef & broccoli at my favorite Hakka restaurant Federicks, and twice I had cajun rainbow trout on green beans at Marlowe's.  I stuck to primal choices.  For 25 days, I avoided alcohol and paleo "treats", I snacked on fat instead of carb-y foods, if I snacked at all.  I was ravenously hungry for 2 weeks and wanted to kill something.  Then I wasn't that hungry at all, the cravings subsided--until that hormone poison time rolled around again and I wanted to kill something once more.

Sure, you could argue there was room for improvement. (There is always room for improvement nomatter what they tell you).  But you'd also think that the absence of paleo cakes, cookies, stuffed dates and many, many glasses of wine would have made a huge difference.  Not so much, it turns out.  Ok, not at all.

So I'm left to draw 2 conclusions to this little experiment.

First, its that calories do count.  I did not cut calories.  I kept my fruit consumption to 2 servings a day, I kept my carb intake at a very reasonable low, but I substituted fat into my diet where I cut carbs out.

And secondly, I'm left to assume that this weight, all 128.5 lbs of me, is the way it was meant to be.  This is me, at 41, at 5'6", after 2 kids.  This is the way I am.  Some women are skinnier, some women are more muscular, some women are much heavier and would kill to weigh what I way.

This is just the way I am.

I can accept that.

Sure, I could beat myself up over it, I could eat less food, I could work out harder.  But I already try pretty hard.  I already eat a paleo diet and exercise and get 8 hours of sleep--anything more would just mean less time for what I love most--getting outside and just having fun with my life.  Because you only get to live this life once.

Do what you can to live as long and healthy of a life as you can.  But don't let all that healthy stuff so completely overwhelm you that you don't have the time and energy to enjoy the healthy body that you've tried so hard to create.  Know what I mean?  People sometimes forget that part.